“Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble.” (1 Pet 3:8, NIV)

We are privileged to belong to God’s family, a community with Jesus Christ as the founder and foundation. Everyone in this community is related – we are all brothers and sisters, loved equally by God. God teaches us to love one another. But sometimes we may feel that it is much easier to love God than to love others. It is easy to say that we love God when it doesn’t cost anything more than weekly attendance at church services. But the real test of our love for God is how we treat the people in front of us – our family members and fellow believers. We cannot truly love God while neglecting to love people around us in God’s family.

Whoever hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him. (1 Jn 3:15) 

Does this mean that if you dislike someone, you aren’t a Christian? John’s words focus on the attitude that causes us to ignore or despise others, to treat them as irritants, competitors, or enemies. Christian love is not a feeling but a choice. We can choose to be concerned with people’s well-being and treat them with respect, whether or not we feel affection toward them. If we choose to love others, God will help us express our love.

Most of us have learned how to pretend to love others – how to speak kindly, avoid hurting their feelings, and appear to take an interest in them. But God calls us to have sincere love, affection, and respect for each other (Rom 12:9-10). As Christians, we honor people because they are our brothers and sisters in Christ, because we are grateful for the ways they are building up the body of Christ, the church. What is your response when a fellow believer is honored? When someone is suffering? We are called to rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep (Rom 12:15). Too often, unfortunately, we are jealous of those who rejoice and separate ourselves from those who weep. We cannot concern ourselves only with our own relationship with God; we need to get involved in the lives of others.

Paul tells us to cast off sins of speech: expressions of anger, cursing, dirty language, and lying (Col 3:8). These are relationship breakers. We need to remind ourselves not to criticize or speak evil of others; it works against God’s command to love one another. We also need to remind ourselves not to think of other fellow believers as slanderers. If so, we would just keep a distance from our brothers and sisters. Rather, Paul tells us to practice signs of brotherly love: compassion, kindness, humility, patience, gentleness, and forgiveness (Col 3:12-13). These are relationship builders, which we are to express as members of God’s family. Let us treat our relationships with other believers as an outgrowth of our faith.