I am often asked in passing how married life is going. I never know how to answer such a loaded question in a brief sentence. I think most of the time I am asked out of courtesy, like how’s it going, or how are you. It would be polite to just reply “fine,” but there is more space here than four characters, so here’s what I have to say:

Kevin and I are opposites in many ways, and that tension brings out the worst and best of us, often resulting in a literal tug of war of blankets, clothes, and chores. And, I think these are the moments that test the marriage–not the fancy sparkly anniversary celebrations planned by Kevin that I admittedly sometimes daydream about.

In Joshua 6, the obedient, mundane, silent marching of the Israelites for six days around Jericho led to a victory delivered by God. This reminded me that keeping up with the mundane and repetitive tasks that make an organized and functional home are the elements of a victorious marriage in the Lord. It’s not easy because little things that are ignored pile up–I know because the last load of laundry is still unfolded, the stack of bills is like a rising tide, and every chair in the living room is occupied by papers, books, and boxes. On top of that, Kevin and I are trying arrange time to pray and read the Bible together every day, the “ark” of our daily march which should be prioritized before any other to-do.

Where Kevin takes me for our next vacation or for a fancy anniversary celebration will be great, but more important are how we handle the routine tasks of cleaning, cooking, doing laundry, ironing, and managing our budget.

So the next time you ask me how married life is going – make sure you’ve also got time to hear out my reply.