I imagine that sometimes when people say, “I’m sorry for your loss” it can be a little frustrating because it does not seem like they could possibly understand or if it would even change anything.

Recently, a good friend got me to open up about my grievances and she turned out to be an incredible listener. When I was finished, she said something very simple but really meaningful to me. She said, “That’s unfortunate and I’m sorry you felt it, but do you think you are a stronger person now? You’ve grown and gained more experience.”

I felt like her consolation was different because she really meant it and showed genuine care even though I had not told her every single detail. Later, upon reflection, I wondered to myself why she would so sincerely apologize to me. I thought, “Why should an innocent third party have to apologize on anyone’s behalf?” I concluded that this was simply out of the pure love of friendship.

Similarly, isn’t Jesus an innocent arbitrator who apologizes for our sins on our behalf every day?

Our Lord Jesus also gives us the best consolation because, like an earthly father, it is hard for Him to see His dear children in pain “for we do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin” (Heb 4:15).

And with faith, perhaps we can hear His gentle whisper through friends who tell us, “That’s unfortunate and I’m sorry you felt it, but do you think you are a stronger person now? You’ve grown and gained more experience.”